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Jurassic World Dominion
JURASSIC WORLD DOMINION* is not exactly the “dinosaurs running loose in the world” story I expected from the ending of JURASSIC WORLD: FALLEN KINGDOM – it ends up centering on yet another dinosaur park...
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Walking with Dinosaurs
This was my final destination for VERN’S DOCUMENTARY WEEK, the BBC series that got so much attention a few months back when it played on the discovery channel. But who the fuck watches discovery...
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programming note: Jurassic Park 3
Okay, I’m confusing myself here. In preparing for my Summer of 2001 10th Anniversary Retrospective I skipped watching JURASSIC PARK III (which was released July 18th, 2001), because I watched it again...
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The Extraordinary Adventures of Adèle Blanc-Sec
Luc Besson might be back. For a while there he was doing those ARTHUR movies for kids, then he said he wasn’t gonna direct anymore. To be fair I haven’t watched the ARTHUR movies, because in the U.S....
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The Tree of Life
“You know what? I’ve never actually seen a Terrence Malick movie,” I admitted, embarrassed. “WHAT?!” my film buff buddy blurted out. “And you see every crappy movie that comes out!” “That’s not true!”...
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Jurassic Park 3D
Somehow I’ve gone all these years and never reviewed a JURASSIC PARK movie. Somewhere in a notebook I think I have a partly written review of THE LOST WORLD from the last time I watched it, and I...
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Transformers: Age of Extinction
For God’s sake don’t take this as high praise, but TRANSFORMERS: AGE OF EXTINCTION is the most legitimate movie in the TRANSFORMABLES saga so far. Not too legit to quit while they’re ahead, but...
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The Lost World: Jurassic Park
Man, this review has been in development almost as long as JURASSIC WORLD. After I typed this up I found an old version I wrote in a notebook a couple years ago, when I had mentioned liking THE LOST...
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Jurassic World
Let’s face it, MAD MAX: FURY ROAD means this is an all time great movie summer. Whatever else comes out, who gives a shit. Irrelevant. It could be nothing but THE COBBLER coming out every week until...
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The Land Before Time
THE LAND BEFORE TIME is a good example of a movie legacy destroyed by a “franchise.” Throughout the ’90s the name was synonymous with candy-colored sing-along babysitters in clamshells thanks to...
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Super Mario Bros.
a survey of summer movies that just didn’t catch on “Are you tellin us that you’re gonna arrest a guy for bein a plumber? Get outta here!” May 28, 1993 Okay, look. I’m not claiming to know a better way...
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Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom
This is weird, there’s a JURASSIC PARK sequel that came out 2 1/2 months ago and I didn’t get around to seeing it until this weekend, when it’s down to two showings a day. I think I saw all the other...
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Yor, the Hunter from the Future
No – you’re the hunter from the future. It’s fair to say that YOR, THE HUNTER (spoiler) FROM THE FUTURE is a cheesy movie. And though its 89 minutes are whittled down from an Italian mini-series of...
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